Things they don’t tell you about parenthood

You’ll be absolutely, capital-G-Gutted when you see a train (or whatever your kid loves) and they’re either sleeping or not with you.

You’ll (happily) go mining in your kid’s nose.

Gestation and birth is alien. Your own or adopted, the kid becomes yours at some point while you’re busy caring for them.

You’ll genuinely be so flippin’ excited to go to the zoo because you can’t wait to see their reaction.

You’ll do *anything* to make them laugh. Over and over. And over. In public.

You’ll have someone else take a picture of you in your wedding suit on an aircraft carrier in New York so you can send a shot like this to your kid right around bedtime.

And he will LOVE IT.